Notes from the Rafters Special Edition: My Candidly Burning Questions for the Candidates

"Andy Wells: If elected mayor, will you keep tweeting? Please."

What do you, the reader, really want to know? Ask in the comments section online! No question too big, too small, too weird, too honest, too silly, too messy. But if it’s squalid and mean or about traffic or parking I will judge you.

If you entered the race after my article deadline, please introduce yourself in the comments and tell us 1. Which character you would be in S.E Hinton’s “The Outsiders” 2. Chuckley pear, service berry, or Saskatoon berry?

WARD 1

Lou Puddister

What do you think will help your chances more: that you look like Art Puddister or that your name sounds like Art Puddister?

Deanne Stapleton

As a board member of the St. John’s Port Authority, do you listen to Bing Crosby’s version of “Don’t Fence Me In” with delicious irony at the conclusion of each meeting? Or do you prefer the Roy Rogers’ version of the song?

WARD 2

Hope Jamieson

How many ward 2 constituents have, to date, stopped you in the street to “thank you for running against Galgay so I don’t have to!”

WARD 3

Peter McDonald

You don’t have much of an internet presence, but I’ve seen you a lot watching the council meetings next to Andy Wells. Is Andy Wells your BFF? And if he is, would you say so? And if he isn’t, would you say so anyway so you don’t hurt his feelings?

Walter Harding

So. Election signs got you bummed out, huh? No one but you following the rules, eh? Your dedication to by-law detail is truly …apparent. Your commitment to pointing out other people breaking minor infractions is about as Canadian as a Tim’s soaked maple poutine. Anything we-the-public can do to turn that frown upside down? Besides volunteering with you for one of your many neighbourhood clean-ups after the election; we’ve got a … thing that day.

Jamie Korab

Why did you pick curling over exhibition shirling? A. I hate Canada B. I am afraid of “new snakes” C. People don’t assume I drive a pick-up truck when I wear the shirling kilt.

WARD 4

Ian Froude

I have it on good authority that you showed up at a panel discussion called “Women in Politics” and did not once try to interrupt. In fact, you quietly listened without ever so much as letting the room know you were also a candidate and had some super thoughts on feminism too. How can you be trusted to stand up to status quo at city hall if you won’t even stand up in a room full of women?

Scott Fitzgerald

You run a lot, but can you ever run fast enough to outrun the demands of the sad monster that is Kenmount Terrace? #crossfit

WARD 5

Jamie Finn

What’s the deal with people swooning over the peas on the fries, dressing, gravy at Keith’s Diner? Like, it’s just peas, right? What am I missing? Also, would you be able to answer that honestly or would you not be able to answer that honestly? You can whisper it. You can send me a private message about how you really feel about it.

Wally Collins

I still want to know what that report said. You know, the one about the allegations of misconduct or harassment or … what? I don’t know because neither the accusations not the findings were ever released to the public. We were only privy to the fact that something happened and something was done about it.

Mike Walsh, Fraser Piccott, Paul Dinn: Guys, I can’t keep up with all ye jumping into the race so late! But okay… is it “The Goulds” or just “Goulds”? Don’t look at what the other ones are writing.

AT LARGE

Maggie Burton

I heard, in the comment section of a Facebook thread below a Telegram article, that you ride a vacuum cleaner; are you a witch?

Ron Ellsworth

Would diversity and inclusivity be better served by long serving incumbent council members stepping down and back into the private sector? Taking all they’ve (you’ve) learned about how the city runs and how it could run and mixing that knowledge back into the worlds of local enterprise, simultaneously making small pockets of space for new and different blood and perspectives on council? Or is “as is” the best policy?

Art Puddister

Are you related to Lou Puddister? Are you brothers? I’ve heard you are brothers. Or maybe cousins? Or is he your dad or your son? Or are you just lovers with the same last name, but the name thing is a coincidence?

Tom Hann

I have no queries for you. You are perfect as you are. You just keep on being you, Hann. Hann the man.

Dave Lane

What’s more important, doing things or communicating about doing things? Quick! You’ve already used your “setting up a task-force” and “public polling” life lines!

Sandy Hickman

How did it feel, after a dang tough year, when you found out fellow councillor Jonathan Galgay tried to distract his fed-up constituents’ wrath from himself by noting that you, head of the traffic committee, weren’t sitting in on the last half of the public meeting he called on #motonoise on Signal Hill?

DEPUTY MAYOR

Sheilagh O’Leary

I heard that you swam across the tickle; Does that mean you, like Burton, are also a witch?

MAYOR

Andy Wells

If elected mayor, will you keep tweeting? Please.

Renee Sharpe

I heard you want to use Mile One for something other than not making money and doing sports. Is that what makes you antifa? Or is it nose rings?

Danny Breen

As mayor, would you be getting fancier glasses to go with the mayoral throne? More flamboyant maybe? Even Danny changed his hair eventually.

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2 Comments

  • I’ve got a question for all candidates: How will they manage and govern the increasingly city-state situation that St. John’s finds itself within Newfoundland and Labrador? The NE Avalon looks like to be the only place expected to grow in this province, which will mean St. John’s taking more and more responsibility over creating prosperity for subsequent re-distribution. Corner Brook doesn’t appear to be pulling its weight over on the west coast, so my vote would be to carve out Mount Pearl and transport it a few hundred kilometers west to balance things out again.

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