I know, right? Facebook is getting so boring. It’s full of people saying the same obvious things about Donald Trump, city council, the weather, and how cute their kids are. It’s no wonder Instagram is more popular than ever for mindless, idle distractions from the monotony of our days. Here’s a few accounts to feed your feed:
The co-creators @BrosBeingBasic have partnered up to fill your feeds with images of fashion faux-pas dads, and they pair their pics to witty descriptive paragraphs in the style of fashion reporters. It’s equal part parody of fashionista speak, and a celebration of dads who’ve just given up on the vanity of value placed in appearance.
Texts from Your Ex collects and posts screengrabs people receive from jaded lovers. You can send your own screenbrabs to email@example.com. It’s a great glimpse at how a rejected heart can rewire the brain into a disasterous state. You don’t need to know what prompted these texts to gasp, giggle, and share them. From raging perverts to sad pleas for a cuddle, the messy wasteland of the human heart is on full display.
Samantha Lee takes food pics to a whole new level, creating art of food presentation. As a young mom, it started as a way to get her kids to eat.
This account is a biting stab at the basic stuff most of us are filling people’s feeds with. @satiregram takes pictures of notes saying stuff like “an overhead shot of leg legs in bed. There is also a book opened to a random page so you’ll think I’m reading,” and “A tall glass of beer next to an empty bottle at a bar because I want everyone to know that I’m starting to get into craft beer.” If you want to laugh at yourself, or the mundanity of the modern world, this is the account for you. “A selfie of me in my car before work. I am probably going to be late because I have to type my favourite song lyrics in the caption too.” No one’s safe from being called out here.
Jessica Anteby posts a steady stream of funny enough and occasionally hilarious memes. “Beige cardigan” is slang for B’lah, and her account celebrates the everyday b’lah of our lives.
This account posts bad Tinder dialogues. A quick look at @tindernightmares and it’s clear why most men with a Tinder account are single and looking. Granted some of the attempted pickup lines are endearing. “If I were a neurotransmitter, I would be your dopamine so I could activate your reward pathway.” Other posts bypass rude and jump right to creepy, “I actually swiped right for your dog.” And hey, you gotta try in the dating world right? Check this one out: “Hey Tyler, I want to be honest up front. I actually swiped for your friend in the first picture. Any way for me to get in touch with her if she’s interested?” For you hopeless romantics feeling left in suspense, here was the answer: “She’s married, F@ck Off!”
Their self-description says it all. “Calling out dudes who turn hostile when rejected or ignored.” Like Textsfromyourex, it collects and shares submitted screengrabs to shame skeets, while providing a glimpse into the dark recesses of humanity.