How to Waste Your Life on the Web: Halloween Edition

Looking for the spookiest movies? pumpkin carving templates? Eerie Dolls on Ebay?

Wheres the Jump
wheresthejump.com

Need spooky movie recommendations with guaranteed frights? Where’s The Jump is a database of “jump scares” in films, helping you choose a movie with the most cheap scares.

New Zealanders Anthony Wilson and Luke Alsop are responsible for this online guide to every “suddenly something in the mirror” and “it was just a cat”, with a short description and the time in the movie the scare occurs. A star rating is also provided based on the intensity and frequency of jump scares in the film.

“We started it about three months ago and have added about 110 movies so far,” says Wilson. “We hope to have 300 or so by the end of the year.” To maximize scares, the WTJ crew recommend a surround sound system or just watching with a big group of people. For professionals: headphones.

Pumpkin Carving Patterns and Templates
http://pumpkinglow.com

It’s October. If you really cared about your Halloween costume, you would’ve started it in August. So, bluff your way to “Halloween give-a-damn” by carving a sweet pumpkin.

Haunted Dolls on eBay
www.ebay.com – Huanted Dolls

“This is Opal . She is 18 years old. Opal died in a fire.  She is very active and likes to move around my home.  She loves children and would be happiest with other spirits around her. She has a very high EMF (electromagnetic field) reading.”

That’s a pretty typical start to just one of the hundreds of ads on eBay for what sellers claim are legit haunted dolls, which can sell for hundreds of dollars each.

Dolls are scary enough in their own right, but the loving detail and seriousness that sellers use to describe their glass-eyed children is enough to give your the seasonal creeps.

“SINCE I HAVE OWNED HER, ALL I FEEL IS THAT SHE IS STARING AT ME, BUT THIS DOES NOT BOTHER ME( TOO MUCH?!)…  ANYWAY, SHE HAS HAD  SOME ROUGH/SAD TIMES THAT HER FACE DOES SHOW THIS AND A  FEW -THIN CRACK LINES TO  THE SIDE OF HER FACE AND BEHIND HER HEAD   .  HER, HEAD, ARMS AND LEGS ARE TAPED-UP ?”

“Karla can be channeled through pendulum dowsing, telepathy, and the board… Her preferred means to communicate is through dreams.” As always, be careful with your witchboard (and your credit card): “eBay forbids the sale of intangible items and I am strictly selling this as a doll.”

Sure thing, eBay. These dolls are clearly haunted as eff.

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